Writing a Convincing Culprit

December 15, 2014 / Mystery Writing Tips / 18 COMMENTS


by Harrison Demchick, @HDemchickHarrison Demchick

Have you ever read a mystery where the culprit’s motivations made no sense at all?

Or how about one where the culprit is caught because he did something he would never plausibly do?

I’ve seen quite a lot of this in the mysteries I’ve edited. Mystery is a genre of logic, and a good mystery is a puzzle waiting to be solved, but where that puzzle so often falls apart, particularly in early drafts (and even for very talented writers), is with the culprit. And the reason is that, very often, the actions of the culprit serve the story rather than the character.

There’s a reason for that. In most fiction, we develop our story around the protagonist. It’s the protagonist with whom we spend most of our time, and if there’s a character arc, it’s usually hers. The experience of the novel is defined by her actions and experience.

But mystery is a little different, and the reason it’s different is that it’s the antagonist’s actions that really drive the story. The culprit commits the crime, and the detective reacts. That’s not to say that the detective is inactive—she’s certainly trying to solve the mystery, and ultimately both characters are reacting to one another (even before we know who the culprit is)—but fundamentally, the detective’s story is unraveling the culprit’s story. And that means that you, as author, need to know the culprit’s story as well and as clearly as the detective’s.

Moreover, that story, and the character who lives it, need to make sense.

Question #1: Who is this guy, and what’s with the bunny ears?

Think it’s a cool idea for your killer to wear bunny ears and sunglasses? Fair enough—but you’ve got to know why. Childhood love of bunnies? Ardent Bugs Bunny fan? Or is it just that he loves the look of confusion in the eyes of the people he kills? Any of it can be valid, but you need to be careful not to bind yourself to a cool image without understanding the character underneath it.

I edited a novel once that featured a killer who dressed as a priest. It was a compelling visual, but it was never really explained, and in the end it didn’t seem to fit the character in any way, so it didn’t work.

The culprit is a character like any other. He has wants and needs that define his goals, and the actions he takes, consciously or unconsciously, are in service of those goals.

Question #2: So what does he do about it?

Simple answer: Whatever he wants to do.

The central problem with a lot of culprits in a lot of mysteries is that their actions are designed to push the story in the direction in which the author wants it to go. A killer spends most of the story eluding the police with astounding intelligence and care, but then, because it’s time for the story to end, strolls by the police station wearing a T-shirt that says “I killed all those people.”

Okay, that’s an exaggeration. But consider that mystery I edited. Priest costume aside, the killer always struck at night and always used poison—until the last third of the story, where the killer suddenly struck during the day with a gun. In the climax, the killer used poison again, but this time in broad daylight at a crowded party. Why? Because we were getting near the end and the author wanted the detective to catch the killer.

A culprit is not going to kill just to give the detective another murder to consider (unless, of course, he’s intentionally playing a game with the detective). He’s not going to change his modus operandi in order to leave that crucial bit of evidence that had otherwise been eluding the detective—the break in the case the story demands. He’s going to serve his own needs. He’s going to kill, or steal, or whatever he does because he wants to—because it helps him cleanse society of those he deems sinners, or take over his family’s business, or repeat the psychologically ingrained murder of his wife.

This doesn’t mean that your culprit is an unchanging monolith. The culprit is a character, and as such, he reacts to things. He reacts to the detective getting close. He reacts to extraneous circumstances. He’s human. But it’s got to make sense within the context of his own story.

Question #3: So does that mean all mysteries should be written from both characters’ points of view?

Not at all. I’m not saying you need to write your mystery from the culprit’s perspective. But you need to know it. Readers may never see that parallel narrative, but they do need to see a culprit who is living it—one who is the protagonist of his own story, as most characters are. The culprit’s story may not be your story, but it is the logical foundation of your story, and you can’t craft a compelling mystery without knowing, at all times, who your culprit is and why they do what they do.

In other words, the culprit doesn’t serve your story. He is your story. Understand him and good things will follow.

Harrison Demchick came up in the world of small press publishing, working along the portraitcolor smallway on more than three dozen published novels and memoirs, several of which have been optioned for film. An expert in manuscripts as diverse as young adult, science-fiction, fantasy, mystery, literary fiction, women’s fiction, memoir, and everything in-between, Harrison is known for quite possibly the most detailed and informative editorial letters in the industry—if not the entire universe.

Harrison is also an award-winning, twice-optioned screenwriter, and the author of literary horror novel The Listeners (Bancroft Press, 2012). He’s currently accepting new clients in fiction and memoir at Ambitious Enterprises (http://ambitiousenterprises.com).

 

  1. Elizabeth – Thanks for hosting Harrison.

    Harrison – Thanks for sharing your thoughts on culprits. You’re absolutely right that it’s important for that character to have some depth and motivation. Otherwise the mystery loses credibility.

    1. Definitely, Margot. Of course, you always want your primary characters to have depth and motivation, regardless of genre, but mystery presents a particular set of consequences should that not be the case.

    1. Naturally, there are going to be times when the plot pops into your head before the character does. The evolution of a narrative can come in a lot of different ways. But ultimately, in the actual writing, while the plot can be malleable to the character, the character can’t be malleable to the plot.

      You’re right, though, Diane–a lot of that characterization may never be explicit on the page. One of the trickiest parts of any story, and certainly a mystery, is understanding exactly what to reveal to the reader and when to reveal it.

  2. Great thoughts! I’m still learning how to write mysteries–they’re a completely different animal from other genres. I’ll definitely pay attention to my culprit.

      1. I tend more toward urban fantasy/thriller action/adventure kinds of stories. My Spacetime series has a different genre for each book. First one is straight up urban fantasy, the next is an urban fantasy/mystery, the third is urban fantasty/romance, and the next one in the pipe is urban fantasy/political thriller.

        So far, for me, romance and mystery have had enormous learning curves. And I LIKE reading those genres. It’s just that reading a mystery/romance is completely different from writing one.

        1. Absolutely! And of course, that applies to all genres–I *wish* reading great books made us all instantly great writers–but fluency in one genre doesn’t make you great at another.

          Practice and determination, on the other hand, can, and I love that you’re exploring so many different areas of writing. Not everyone can do that. And you’ll probably find that the tools you pick up in one genre can be applied to the next in some very interesting ways.

  3. Culprits are definitely harder to understand! I have managed to understand them well enough for my protagonist’s perspective, but in November I wrote a book that for the first time INCLUDED that PoV and it was much harder!

    1. Jemi, that may be one of the most important reasons understanding your antagonist is important. Even if that lack of understanding doesn’t disrupt the narrative (which it usually does), it *will* create an unsatisfying ending, and you don’t want to leave your readers with a bad last impression. That’s a sure way to guarantee a less than stellar review and one fewer reader for the next novel.

  4. Thanks Elizabeth for hosting Harrison and thanks Harrison for the advice! Very much to the point. And I would argue that this is true of any good novel, not just mysteries. In every case, no matter the genre, by the time you reach the end, you need to be convinced that you understand as a reader why the novel ended that way. All the strings are pulled in the climax, and everyone needs to be pulled in a convincing (logical) way. If you’re left with any doubt or unexplained events in the story, then it’s simply NOT satisfying!

    And yes, speaking for myself, I know I shall never read that author again!

    1. Depending on the story, Claude, I think you can get away with unexplained events, but what you can’t get away with are unconvincing events. It’s so easy, when you know where you want your story to go, to push it in that direction, but all that does is reveal the author and lose the reader.

  5. Dear Elizabeth,

    I have had the pleasure of reading and saving your posts during 2014. I have learned from them and enjoyed your writing. Where you get the time is a mystery but you certainly are generous to others.

    I am a newcomer with a new website, this week, and a U.K. track record in publishing plus I am from Charlotte, Myers Park and South High Schools, so I feel like a kindred spirit.

    Merry Christmas and thanks for brightening my year.
    Lauren

    1. Lauren–What a sweet thing to say! I really appreciate it.

      Very nice website, by the way….I just clicked over. Congratulations to you on everything you’ve accomplished so far!

      And a former neighbor, too. :) Charlotte is a lovely town.

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