Getting Comfortable with Tooting Your Own Horn: 4 Tips for Making Promotion More Palatable

By Patricia Crisafulli, @TrishCrisafulli

The first time I had to write a professional bio, a friend of mine staged a public-relations intervention. “This says nothing,” she said, shaking her head at the scant lines I had written. “Where are your accomplishments?” In the end, she had to write the first draft, and I was only allowed to edit for accuracy.

Despite my long-held dreams of becoming an author and holding a book with my name on the spine, being promotional—and, more to the point, self-promotional—has always been challenging for me. The difficulty is rooted in my upbringing. When I was growing up, the youngest in a trio of sisters, my mother told me, “You have to stop doing so much. You make other people feel bad.” 

Suffice it to say, I believed that talking about what I had done or wanted to do was tantamount to bragging—and bragging was rude and cruel. So even when I accomplished something, I had to minimize or dismiss it. Fortunately, I learned a different lesson over time.

Many years ago, I read a quote from Marianne Williamson: “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us… Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you.” Even now, re-reading these words, I can feel something shift inside me, a loosening in my chest that lets me take a deep breath.

With each inhalation, I find the courage to carry out one of the primary responsibilities of being a writer. In a word—it’s stewardship, an attitude and a perspective that make promotion more palatable.

• This is our job. Let’s face it—marketing and promoting may not come easily to writers who are more likely to be introverts (even when we appear to be extroverts). We tell ourselves, “Once our books are out there, people will find them.” But in this age of social media and building a platform—not to mention getting noticed in a crowded category such as mysteries—we have to toot our own horns. It’s our job and our obligation to ourselves and to our books.
• Marketing is really community building. I know, I know … This one sounds like rationalization and justification. But it really is true. Only by speaking up and speaking out about what we’ve written can we engage with a community. Readers are always on the lookout for the next great read, and they deserve to know about our books. Granted, that can be scary because not everyone is going to be a raving fan. Some people will like our stories, some will love them, and some—well, maybe not so much. That’s to be expected—people’s tastes are as varied as their life experiences. But only by connecting with a community can we become good stewards of our stories that deserve to find their readers.
• It’s not you—it’s them. The characters, that is. When I began writing what became my Ohnita Harbor Mystery Series, I sketched out my protagonist, Gabriela, an authenticator-librarian turned accidental sleuth. Then came her feisty Italian American mother, Agnese; the artist-roofer and love interest, Daniel Red Deer; and a host of quirky characters. In the beginning, they were little more than cartoons, until I got to know them through the process of writing and rewriting. Suddenly, they took on lives of their own and even surprised me at times. The more I fell in love with my characters, the more they deserved to have their story (albeit a fictional one) told—and the more responsibility I felt to introduce them to readers. A few weeks after a book launch event for my first novel, The Secrets of Ohnita Harbor, a reader approached me and said, “I’ve been so worried about Gabriela. She gets herself in so much trouble!” That was the best reaction I could ever imagine—for her (and for me).
• You’re going to inspire others. One of the first podcasts to host me was Meg Leddy’s Burnout: What I Have Learned So Far. Rather than talking only about my debut mystery novel, I had to get personal about finding the time to create while juggling numerous responsibilities. It was one of the best conversations of my professional life. I unearthed a truth that I had not fully embraced before that podcast: in the midst of a busy life, I energize myself by doing more, not less—as long as that “more” is something I love. To my delight, that podcast inspired others. I heard from friends and strangers alike that they found encouragement to continue their own journeys into creativity and life enrichment. Instead of making others feel bad as I had been admonished as a teenager, I actually made others feel good. 

Yes, our stories are born of hard work, imagination, and talent. But once they are in the world, they exist outside of us. That’s when we have to step up to the challenge of nurturing each book, short story, essay, blog, or any other creative expression. Recognizing that responsibility gives us both courage and permission to toot our horns—and, while we’re at it, ring a few bells. 

Patricia Crisafulli is a New York Times bestselling author and an award-winning fiction writer. She launched her Ohnita Harbor Mystery Series from Woodhall Press with The Secrets of Ohnita Harbor, followed by the sequel, The Secrets of Still Waters Chasm. The third book in the series will be published in 2025.

Image by Daniel Dan outsideclick from Pixabay