That’s What She Said: 3 Dialogue Tips

by HL Carpenter, @hl_carpenter

We think about how much writing styles change over the years every time we open one of the books on our reading shelf—a book that was published in 1908. Of the many differences between today’s style and the approach used back then, we find the evolution of dialogue especially interesting.

Here are three stylistic comparisons.

1. “We’re not fans of fancy dialogue tags,” they said.

In today’s style, if “said” isn’t enough after dialogue, the sentence needs to be reworked. The reader should know what’s going on from the words, not because the writer has added a description of the way the words are supposed to sound.

In the book from 1908, dialogue tags are not only fancy, but at least one of them appears to be made up.

Examples include:

“Now, Orde,” said he, “here is where you come in.”

“Look here, Joe,” he objected.

“Not a bit,” negatived Newmark.

“But, Mother,” expostulated Carroll.

2. Based on comments from editors, good dialogue avoids overuse of character names. “Not that we would know personally of course, Elizabeth,” they said. :)

Think about real life conversation. How often do you use the name of the person to whom you’re speaking? You probably don’t include given names in every sentence. Applying that habit to fictional conversations can make the narrative flow more smoothly.

The book from 1908 follows this practice as well. Typically, the author includes given names when the conversation includes multiple participants.

3. We think avoiding words no one ever uses outside of crossword puzzles is a good idea…unless your hero is a naturally pompous speaker. “I really must request elucidation on that prohibition,” the hero said.

Here again, the idea is to model real-life conversation.

The dialogue in the book from 1908 comes across as stilted, though this is likely due to today’s less formal conversational habits. Here’s an example:

“In a moment,” replied Gerald. “Have patience. I have come in the last twenty-four hours to a decision. That this happens not to affect my own immediate fortunes does not seem to me to invalidate my philosophy.”

A final note: No matter how writing styles change, a solid, engaging story can overcome the drag of datedness. The book we used for this comparison is the tale of a turn-of-the-nineteenth century riverman, published in 1908 and written in the terminology and mores of the time. Not our usual choice of reading material.

And yet— We’ve read the book before, but we once again found ourselves drawn into the story while writing this post.

In the end, a book that talks to the reader is the best dialogue of all.

About HL Carpenter

Mother/daughter author duo HL Carpenter write family-friendly fiction from their studios in Carpenter Country, a magical place that, like their stories, is unreal but not untrue. When they’re not writing, they enjoy exploring the Land of What-If and practicing the fine art of Curiosity. Visit HLCarpenter.com to enjoy gift reads and excerpts and to find out what’s happening in Carpenter Country.

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About Walled In: 

When her father is accused of fraud, seventeen-year-old Vandy Spencer discovers her entire life has been built on a heart-shattering deception.

Image: Josh Felise on Unsplash